Friday, 23 December 2016

The Best Laid Plans...

Short Stories, Humour, Music and Entertainment! Occasional HOT TOPICs with a unique perspective..

It's Christmas!

When a man politely opens the door of the car for his wife,  you can be sure of one thing:

Either the car is new or the wife is!

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?

Stress is when wife is pregnant;

Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant;

Panic is when both are pregnant!

Grammar Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?

Kid: "Yeah, once my sister said she had missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack and our driver ran away!"

A young boy asks his Dad: "What is the difference between confident and confidential?

Dad says: "You are my son, ..I'm confident about that. Your friend over there,  is also my son,  that, is confidential!"

A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman:
“Which book has helped you most in your life?”

The woman replied , “My husband’s cheque book!"

A prospective husband in a book store, Do you have a book called, "Husband the Master of the House?" 

Sales Girl : “Sir, Fiction and Comics are on the 1st floor!"

Someone asked an old man : “Even after 70 years, you still call your wife Darling, Honey,  and Love." What’s your secret?"

Old man : "I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her!"

Wife : "I wish I was a newspaper. So I’d be in your hands all day."

Husband : "I too wish that you were a newspaper. So I could have a new one every day!"

Sunday, 6 November 2016

Airport Security

George's More Than A  Pet Peeve.. But A Major Psychotic Episode

This is to clarify that the content of the video is entirely for comedic purposes. I wouldn't do anything he suggests in the clip. It's just a Joke! And, if this is George Carlin's own insight and unique perspective, I wouldn't know anything about it, because I never met the man.

George Carlin was very funny.

His humour can be cutting. Sometimes extremely, because often, he takes it to the very edge.

Some would say, terrorism is no laughing matter. Lots of innocent people have been killed and maimed by creatures that have no love, empathy, pity or consideration for humanity. 

Their aim is to get governments to clamp down further on our freedoms, helping to feed on paranoia, with our consent.

Governments all over the globe are fighting the terrorists. There is vast support for everything the authorities are doing to detect, arrest and neutralise terrorists, but we must also do our bit. For instance, we can consciously decide to keep our eyes and ears open more than ever before. 

The government's main job, (in my humble opinion) is  to identify the sponsors, the sources of funding and the arms suppliers than keep terrorism in business.

The rest of us, should stay alert and observant. 

We should all be aware of what is happening around us at all times because those days when we went about our daily business, blissfully unaware of what is going on around us, are over.


It can be perplexing and worrisome to see people engrossed on mobile devices in public. Many seem so unaware because they are usually caught up in their own private virtual universe to the exclusion of everything else that's going on around them. 

We are responsible for our own personal safety, more than the security people who are in charge of keeping a professional eye out and apprehending those who are out to cause chaos and mayhem. 

If we refuse to be terrorised, if we refuse to allow terrorism to change our way of life, the way we interact with one another, keeping an eye out for danger, all these extraordinary and tighter security will be totally unnecessary. We will also be giving a strong message to the sinister forces, that their actions will not impact negatively on our freedom.

George's complaint is about overzealous security whose approach can sometimes rub citizens up the wrong way at the airports. 

A negative approach can give the wrong impression and  a whole lot of satisfaction to the terrorists, that their terrorism is in some ways, curbing our cherished freedoms.

His answers to the three big questions are funny and will probably get him arrested at most airports. 

At best, he wouldn't get to travel on the day, even if the airport security guys have a sense of humour.

We shouldn't really be afraid, instead, we should be alert to keep a keen eye out for anything that looks out of the ordinary at the airport and other public places. 

Refusing to be intimidated by terrorists, is one way to turn the tables, and make them to be afraid of us.

History has proven that the human spirit is indomitably unconquerable. So walk proudly with your head held high. There is nothing to fear but the fear itself!


Saturday, 3 September 2016

7 Cool Ways To Start A Business...

Without Quitting Your Day Job!

You think making money online sounds like a daydream? Well, think again!

There are plenty of ways to turn your skills and interest into cold hard cash.

Starting a business of any kind is hard work, but the fact remains that countless people have done it and are currently thriving. Chances are, you can too!

Whether you're looking to escape the daily grind, or you just want to earn some money on the side,
here are some simple ideas you can use to start a real business without quitting your day job (unless you want to).

  1. Build A Drop-Shipping Empire by sourcing a pre-existing product from a supplier and have them take care of everything else, including packaging and delivery.
  2. Start A Clothing Line - If you already own an online store, you can set up your very own clothing line using plugins. Printify, Printful and Merchify can automatically link your store to apparel printers.
  3. Selling Your Art Online by turning your latest set of masterpieces into a stable revenue stream by having a beautifully designed ecommerce website. A great idea, if you're in the printing trade, are a photographer or a musician.
  4. Become A Freelance Writer, Designer or Developer by putting your talents to good use by helping people across the world with their projects (while making some quick money on the side).
  5. Teaching An Online Course - Put together a video walkthrough explaining a subject that you're familiar with and host it on your own personal website!
  6. Flipping Your Thrift Store Finds - If you love hunting down great deals hitting up thrift stores, then opening up an online boutique to sell your second hand treasures is a natural next step.
  7. Publish Your Own Book - It doesn't matter if it's a science fiction novel, a marketing guide or a children's picture book. There are now plenty of options to successfully self publish your work.

Read on for more information on how to start and scale these 7 online business ideas. They're simple, practical and effective.

You can take your first step by getting started for free today. The only thing you'll need to spend, is just the time it'll take to get the business off the ground!

Good Luck!


Saturday, 23 July 2016

A Bad Boss Day?

Educating, Entertaining and Informing with Short Stories and Humour!

Are You Working for a Tyrannical Bully?

I have been lucky. Most of my working life, I can honestly say, I've had good bosses. Honest, hardworking and dedicated individuals who took their roles seriously. 

The great ones were always courteous, kind and helpful, inspiring the workforce to higher levels of productivity. 

These traits created a comfortably great atmosphere at work and the staff were always happy to go the extra mile because we had a great boss.

The only place I ever worked where the boss was a tyrant and bully, on my first day there, I noticed pinned on to the wall behind someone's desk, the following:

How The Asshole Became Boss

One day, all the organs of the body had a meeting to decide who would be boss. "I should be in charge," said the Brain, "I run everything and work out all solutions." 

"Oh no," said the Stomach, "I process the food through digestion and provide all the fuel and energy. I should be the boss" 

The Heart, Kidney and Lungs wanted to be boss too and made their cases. 

And so it went on until finally the Asshole interrupted and said he should be boss...

They all laughed, giggled and smirked at the idea of asshole being their boss. They really found it funny.

At that point the Asshole went on strike and refused to function. 

By the end of the week, the eyes got watery and blurred and the legs got wobbly. 

At the end of the second week, the stomach became bloated and the arms became lethargic. 

By the end of the fifth week, the heart and lungs were in severe distress and had begun to panic. 

By week six, Brain had a fever and couldn't think straight anymore...

That was when all of them decided to plead with Brain to let the Asshole take over and Brain agreed.  

So the Asshole became the boss and passed out shit while the others worked. 

And that is the reason The Boss Is Always An Asshole!

Bad bosses pick favourites, communicate poorly, misuse their power, are usually rude, take all the credit for other people's work and usually neglect their employees.

Studies show that bad bosses never accept responsibility for their mistakes, the poor decisions and their bad attitude toward people.

17% of employees say their bosses are dishonest. 13% claim their bosses are lazy while 25% say their bosses don't provide enough guidance and opportunities for advancement.

Bad bosses can destroy good staff. Causing them to flee while the remainder lose all motivation.

Know them by their response when you confront them and tell him or her that they're terrible bosses;

1) "A bad boss. Me? You really think so?" Should tell you, he/she doesn't know they're bad.

2) "I could do better if only I knew how!" He/She knows they're bad and wants to improve.

3) "It's my way or the highway!" Tells you they don't care either way!

To all the bad bosses out there, I say; Karma's just sharpening her nails and finishing her drink. She says, she'll be with you shortly because she has your address!

Saturday, 11 June 2016

Meeting Prince

Short Stories, Humour, Music and Entertainment. Just Good Fun. If there's anything to worry about, it's about not having fun!

A Short Story

With Some Reviews

Stories are all works of fiction. Names, characters, place and events are the product of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events and places is totally coincidental


It was around that time in the early evening when the sun was just about to disappear beneath the horizon. The sky had that fading orange hue. I'd missed several buses going home. Now that I was in my neighbourhood of Camden town, I wasn't in any particular hurry to get to my house.

I was looking across the road, checking to see if the musical instrument shop on Chalk Farm Road was still open. Without paying attention to where I was going, I walked into what seemed to be a brick wall. In fact, I'd bumped into a man. My face was inches from his lower chest. The guy was huge.

I looked up at a stern looking face with bushy eyebrows,  his thin lips rested on a square jaw. He was wearing a tuxedo that looked a couple of sizes too small. His biceps were about twice the size of my thighs and he didn't look amused.

Behind him was a little guy wearing a dark designer suit that fit perfectly. He had on a purplish shirt with oversized collars. He looked amused. The big guy hesitated, I hesitated before I said my inevitable sorry. "Hey, how you doing?" the small statured guy asked. "I'm okay," I answered. "You didn't hurt your nose or anything bumping into Roland here?" "No!" I said.

Roland relaxed, I relaxed. There was something familiar about the smaller guy, but I couldn't place the face hidden behind the oversized glasses. I could just about see the dark straight hair under the wide brimmed hat that he wore. The conspiratorial look on his face gave the impression that he'd expected me to recognise him. Personally, I couldn't have cared less. I see familiar faces all over Camden on a regular basis.

Camden High Street

My nonchalance must have impressed him and we had an interesting conversation which I promised not to reveal to anyone. They were on a mission scouting out Camden venues. I gave them a few insights about the neighbourhood and the clubs and we said our goodbyes.

Two days later, Prince performed at The Electric Ballroom in Camden. I wasn't in the audience. I didn't even know about it until it came out on the news. Our conversation that evening will remain confidential for now. I will try to keep my promise, although it gets harder every day not telling anyone.

There's more and someday, I'll spill my guts. But not quite yet!


A tribute...In Fiction.


First Peer Review ~ 

How was the central character portrayed and was this portrayal clear and interesting?
First good choice of material. I would have liked to have the main character fleshed out more. The description of Roland and Prince was spot on. 
What made you think this piece was a story and did you want to read on?
It was a light-hearted and a good description of Camden. 
What were the most, and least, successful aspects of the writing?
I thought it could have gone places, after all he's met Prince! We could have been introduced to his jet set life. 

Second Peer Review ~

How was the central character portrayed and was this portrayal clear and interesting?
I enjoyed reading the descriptions, the characters came out vividly and quite mysterious. 
What made you think this piece was a story and did you want to read on?
The narrative gave me the impression that a story was about to unfold; the fact that there were these mysterious two people and they seemed to want something from the narrator was the reason why I read on; and the revelation in the end was quite interesting as well. 
What were the most, and least, successful aspects of the writing?
I think the most successful aspect of the writing was the description. The characters were normally but vividly described, fact which left me with an image from the story. However, the author exceeded the word limit (not much though), and it doesn't really seem like an introductory paragraph. I also think the description of the sky wasn't quite linked to what followed. The introduction could have been a bit more gripping. 

Third Peer Review ~

How was the central character portrayed and was this portrayal clear and interesting?
The main character in this piece of writing is the teller of the story. He is clearly portrayed as nonchalant, cool, casual. particularly through his manner of speech in the genre of 1930's private eye, Marlowe type and in the way he responds to his surroundings and others e,g, He is not phased when he bumps into Ronald. It was entertaining and I enjoyed the interplay between the characters 
What made you think this piece was a story and did you want to read on?
It was a story in that it set the scene and there was a moment of tension when the main character met Roland and the small guy. However we are not led towards the development of a plot because the character keeps his promises! 
What were the most, and least, successful aspects of the writing?
I was drawn to the characters, found them amusing. Thought there was potential to further the plot; set up some kind of dodgy deal between them. The promise thing was disappointing, seemed a bit of a cop out maybe. The last two paragraphs seemed to change style and felt a bit of an after thought. (All respects to Prince though)